Juvenile Cedar Waxwing : Telling Right from Wrong

This is a Cedar Waxwing, a juvenile. When I saw it in the field, I was sure it was something else, a related species that was new to me. And I was excited. Truth be told there was a little bit of pride at play here: that I had added a new bird to my “list” and also that I had studied up ahead of time on the local fauna of my trip and was able to make an ID. I was being a “birder” rather than an Avian Rebbe; I was counting the bird for what it represented rather than appreciating the bird for its own inherent merit. And as I say, all that pride depended on an ID - that turned out to be dead wrong.

Walking into a synagogue can lead to anxiety. Simply: Will I stand/sit at the wrong time? Will I stumble over the Hebrew? Meaningfully: Will I pray incorrectly? Will I somehow offend either the community or even God? “Sure,” you say. “Infrequent visitors to the synagogue will be nervous but not the ‘Regulars’.” Not so. Even our most learned and experienced can feel this way. On the High Holydays, our leader offers up the Hineini prayer, his personal plea that he not make mistakes that would negatively redound to himself or the congregation. Human nature wants to do things right, even - especially? - when surrounded by our closest community.

I was recently offered an honor during a service. In the moment, my mind flashed through fears: I might stumble and be embarrassed. I might fail to honor the prayer, the service, and my community. Frightened of my possible failure, I turned down the honor. I was wrong to do so. I should instead have joyfully accepted, trusting that HaShem and my community would indulge any objective shortcoming on my part. That’s what it means to be part of a holy community. I was wrong to deny the honor, and I was wrong in my ID of the Waxwing. That both have led to shareable lessons proves the worth of not always being right.